So yesterday was my first scheduled live feed on Facebook, and I was absolutely buzzing afterwards. It doesn’t matter how much I do any of the jobs I do, there’s always a little nervous quiver before taking that leap and bearing all! I wasn’t sure if people were just into the product and wouldn’t really want to chat, but it was so lovely to get to know some of you and hear how you are getting on, and for you to connect with each other too.
One of the most common themes that is occurring currently is ‘Spiritual Health’ and the lack of confidence with it. A large chunk of you have now completed one or more 4 weekly reviews, and it seems a common pattern that it is your spiritual health that is suffering, and this area is so closely linked to our self worth, our trust within ourselves, having a solid belief system and from that, building solid relationships.
I wanted to draw upon this a little more in a blog, so you could use it as a template to refer back to whenever you feel disconnected or perhaps less confident in your approach to spiritual health. First of all, I have listed what I see as spiritual health at optimum level and spiritual health that is perhaps suffering.
Connected vs Disconnected
Focus on the positive – Focus on the negative
Clear belief system – Conflict between beliefs
Acceptance of grief, anger, sadness etc – Lack of emotional freedom (bottling up)
Being committed – Disinterest, loss of interest
Sense of self worth – Constant self judgement/criticism
Forgiveness to oneself – Feeling of doom when making mistakes
Peaceful – Aggressive/Shoot from the hip
Has a way of worship (prayer, meditation, stillness, lighting candles) – Disconnected to any for of worship that feeds the soul
Letting things go, understanding what is meant for you will find you – Holding on, controlling what is meant for you
Knowledge that people are different to you – Anger that people are not the same as you
This list is based on my personal understanding of spirituality and is of course subjective to how I see the world, but it is drawn upon real experience, and understanding of how it is to exist on both sides of the spectrum. I have learned only through working through (and still working through) the list above what it is to be spiritually connected.
Moving on from this, I want to introduce you to ways in which you can serve your spiritual being, and therefore balance your health well. You may also find that through actively working on your spiritual health, your other areas will become a lot easier to achieve, and you will become in tune with what your body needs. I have provided a list for you below.
Commit to a mantra
Spend time in nature
These areas are all key for a whole host of reasons, and I will expand on these for you a little now. Firstly, singing and dancing. These two activities are so important because they help to release energy. We all have an aura; an energy field around us, that determines how people feel when they are around us, and how we feel within ourselves. When we feel anxious it contracts close to our body, which is why we have the urge to ‘hide away’ when things become difficult. By singing or dancing, we allow our bodies the opportunities to work through those feelings without having to talk about them. They are emotive actions, and singing in particular serves to raise our vibration, which in turn, allows our energy to flow more freely preventing any blockages within our chakra points. I defy anyone to dance/sing their heart out and no feel an ounce of sweet relief following it. Neither of these activities needs to be done in a special way. You do not need an open mic night at the local pub, or a dance class to attend, just do it where you are and don’t worry about what it looks/sounds like. That’s the beauty of letting yourself go. Google Hugh Grant in Love Actually for inspiration!
Play in particular is a great one for those with children. How many times have you watched your kids completely immersed in role play and wondered how they get such a buzz from it? Well, it’s the ‘letting go’ that is so good for us. Being receptive to role play (take that as you will) will give you the chance to free yourself from your inhibitions. The term ‘free spirit’ is one who is not constrained or conformist. The best thing about play, whether it be with your kids, or by being silly around your friends, is that is warms people to you, and gives them permission to relax and feel more freedom when they are with you. Playing is contagious, and so it’s a great skill to master and it will help you make stronger bonds with everyone around you; your kids, your friends and even your partner too.
‘Speak up‘ is a really important one to understand, because it doesn’t mean ‘kick off’. Speaking up is about remaining true to yourself and what you believe to be right and fair. So many of us, particularly women, seem to spend a lot of time nodding and agreeing with friends, colleagues, family members whilst internally stewing over a decision that has been made or an opinion that has been formed. What we then do is go home and vent to someone about it, and everything we believe is wrong with it, but yet the next day we are back in the same place nodding along. Now, what’s key here is that there are certain ways of speaking up for yourself that need addressing. My Dad always taught me that there are 3 types of people in the world. The ones who know they know (the Richard Branson’s of the world, they’ve been around, been right and wrong and through experience gained a clear understanding of their perception of the world), the ones who know they don’t know, ( me, you, those who are inquisitive and understanding that they have much to learn, and there are those who will know more and can serve them), and then the ones who don’t know they don’t know (these people just don’t know that they don’t know what they talk about and you can not reason with these people and often their intentions are not from a bad place).
What this means is, you need to address what type of person you are dealing with prior to making an active decision to speak up. After all, spiritual health is about achieving peace, and not conflict. If you are dealing with a person who falls into the category ‘they don’t know they don’t know’ all speaking up will do, is create conflict and never result in resolution. These people will be suffering spiritually and perhaps obviously, ‘won’t even know it’. The best thing to do with these people, is achieve healthy distance and remain kind.
With the other two categories, you have the chance to share your view in a friendly and diplomatic way. The ones who know they know will not take offence, they are self assured and have good solid reasons for their actions and will spend the time reassuring you, and taking your points on board. The ones who ‘know they don’t know’ will be grateful for your honesty with them, and will trust in your more in the future because they understand they don’t know everything and will take the time to reflect on anything they’ve said or done.
Always adopt this rule when ‘speaking up’. You know the ones who are not ready to hear it, and if you are struggling to categorise, ask yourself ‘Does this situation make me compromise who I am and what I believe?’ and if it does, then find a way to speak.
Crying is a key one for me. A lot of you have stressed your concerns with not wanting to start your journal in case you have ‘bad day’. I am here to tell you that if you wait for a time when life is perfect, you will never start. Learning to embrace life and all it’s imperfections; celebrating the imperfect as perfect, is what Love Yourself Lean is all about. Crying or getting angry are all human emotions. I really think social media has given us this perception that we can not cry or be unhappy because we won’t be enough or won’t be seen as someone great, but who the fuck doesn’t lose it sometimes. It’s part of our lives and if we avoid it I believe it will only serve to trigger depressing feelings and anxious worries. The spiritual element comes from feeling these emotions, unblocking your chakras whether it be your throat chakra from saying how yo feel, or your heart chakra from having a cry, and the mental health element comes in from letting it go and moving on. Stop fighting feelings that are there to be felt. You are wonderful after you cry. Release the energy and feel free from the suffering.
I am going to combine the next few, mantras, meditation and mindful breathing, as these are all fairly obvious options. Committing to time to sit peacefully, and repeat a personal mantra is a way of focusing on the positive and removing yourself from external influences or elements that might disconnect us from our belief system and our sense of who we are. Highly recommended.
Spend time in nature. Get out in the fresh air. There is a term called ‘grounding’ which draws upon the energy that comes from the electrons that sit beneath the surface of the earth that can recharge us and leave us feeling connecting and alive. But all living things have their own auras too, and nature doesn’t ask what we think of it, it just grows, blossoms, dies and accepts what comes. It is a great environment to be in and leaving technology at home and focusing on the beauty around us can bring us a connection and gratitude we wouldn’t receive from being inside a gym, or watching a TV show. If you exercise and physical health is an easy one for you, link the two together and get outdoors.
Finally, avoiding conflict ties in a little with my speak up expansion, but in short, we are learning to understand that not everyone will always see why we do what we do, and why we feel the way that we feel, and we must understand that this is ok, and that is because someone elses journey or perception of the world may not, and will not always be the same as ours.
I hope that this blog gives you a little more insight to what spiritual health is, and allows you to incorporate it into your daily journalling, alongside other activities you enjoy. Our spiritual health is often so neglected, and can be the reason why so many people find themselves in pristine shape, with the cleanest diets but still lacking in self worth and a connection to what they are here for.
I absolutely loved going live, and am very much looking forward to chatting again soon. My web designer is moving house, but she has promised to look into building a forum within the website where you can subscribe, and log in privately to have regular group chats together. Do let me know what you fancy discussing next?
Anyone who missed the live chat can catch up by clicking here
Keep being you!
All my love